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Dave Barry Talks Back

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Paperback published by Three Rivers Press (Crown Publishing Group)

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About This Book
Yet another collection of Barry wit and wisdom by the Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist and the author of Dave Barry Turns 40.
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Yet another collection of Barry wit and wisdom by the Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist and the author of Dave Barry Turns 40.
Product Details
Paperback (304 pages)
Published: May 12, 1992
Publisher: Crown Publishing Group
Imprint: Three Rivers Press
ISBN: 9780517588680
Other books byDave Barry
  • You Can Date Boys When You're Forty

    You Can Date Boys When You're Forty
    Dave Barry on Parenting and Other Topics He...
    A brilliantly funny exploration of the twin mysteries of parenthood and families from the Pulitzer Prize winner and New York Times–bestselling author of Insane City.   In his New York Times–bestselling I’ll Mature When I’m Dead, Dave Barry embarked on the treacherous seas of adulthood, to hilarious results. What comes next? Parenthood, of course, and families. In uproarious, brand-new pieces, Barry tackles everything from family trips, bat mitzvah parties and dating (he’s serious about that title: “When my daughter can legally commence dating—February 24, 2040—I intend to monitor her closely, even if I am deceased”) to funeral instructions (“I would like my eulogy to be given by William Shatner”), the differences between male and female friendships, the deeper meaning of Fifty Shades of Grey, and a father’s ultimate sacrifice: accompanying his daughter to a Justin Bieber concert (“It turns out that the noise teenaged girls make to express happiness is the same noise they would make if their feet were being gnawed off by badgers”). Let’s face it: families not only enrich our lives every day, they drive us completely around the bend. Thank goodness we have Dave Barry as our guide!

    Peter and the Shadow Thieves

    Peter and the Shadow Thieves
    In this riveting and adventure-packed follow-up to Peter and the Starcatchers, we discover Peter leaving the relative safety of Mollusk Island-along with his trusted companion Tinker Bell-for the cold, damp streets of London. On a difficult journey across the sea, he and Tink discover the dark and deadly, slithering part-man/part-creature Lord Ombra. It seems that the dreaded Ombra has a variety of mysterious powers including the ability to make shadows disappear. When Peter reaches London, he sets out to find the indomitable Molly. Together they must combat Ombra's terrible forces to both protect the Starcatchers and the treasured starstuff and most importantly to rescue Molly's mother from the clutches of evil. Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson have done it again-written a compulsively readable, impossible-to-put-down tale that will delight readers of all ages.

    Dave Barry's Money Secrets

    Dave Barry's Money Secrets
    Like: Why Is There a Giant Eyeball on the Dollar?
    Did you ever wish that you really understood money? Well, Dave Barry wishes that he did, too. But that hasn’t stopped him from writing this book. In it, Dave explores (as only he can) such topics as: • How the U.S. economy works, including the often overlooked role of Adam Sandler • Why it is not a good idea to use squirrels for money • Strategies that will give you the confidence you need to try for a good job, even though you are—let’s be honest—a no-talent loser • How corporate executives, simply by walking into their offices, immediately become much stupider • An absolutely foolproof system for making money in the stock market, requiring only a little effort (and access to time travel) • Surefire tips for buying and selling real estate, the key being: Never buy—or, for that matter, sell—real estate • How to minimize your federal taxes, safely and legally, by cheating • Why good colleges cost so much, and how to make sure your child does not get into one • How to reduce the cost of your medical care by basically not getting any • Estate planning, especially the financial benefits of an early death • And many, many pictures of Suze Orman But that’s only the beginning! Dave has also included in this book all of the important points from a book written by Donald Trump, so you don’t have to read it yourself. Plus he explains how to tip, how to negotiate for everything (including bridge tolls), how to argue with your spouse about money, and how much allowance to give your children (three dollars is plenty). He also presents, for the first time in print anywhere, the Car Dealership Code of Ethics (“Ethic Seven: The customer is an idiot”). Also, there are many gratuitous references to Angelina Jolie naked. You can’t afford not to buy this book! Probably you need several copies. What kind of financial shape are you in right now? This scientific quiz will show you. Be honest in your answers: If you lie, you’ll only be lying to yourself! The place to lie is on your federal tax return. What is your annual income? 1. More than $50,000. 2. Less than $50,000. 3. However much I get when I return these empties. Not counting your mortgage, how much money do you currently owe? 1. Less than $10,000. 2. More than $10,000. 3. Men are threatening to cut off my thumbs. How would you describe your portfolio? 1. Conservative, mainly bonds and blue-chip equities. 2. Aggressive, mainly options and speculative stocks. 3. My what? When analyzing an investment, what do you consider to be the most important factor? 1. The amount of return. 2. The degree of risk. 3. The name of the jockey. How do you plan to finance your retirement? 1. Savings. 2. Social security. 3. Sale of kidneys. —from the Introduction: “Why You Need This Book” Also available as a Crown eBook. From the Hardcover edition.

    Peter and the Sword of Mercy

    Peter and the Sword of Mercy
    Grade Level: 4-6 Age Level: Listening Level: 9-11 Grades 4-6The year is 1902—it’s been twenty-three years since Peter and the Lost Boys returned from Rundoon. Since then, nobody on the island has grown a day older, and the Lost Boys continue their friendship with the Mollusk tribe and their rivalry with Captain Hook. Meanwhile, in London, Molly has married George Darling and is raising three children: Wendy, Michael, and John. One night, a visitor appears at her door; it’s James, one of Peter’s original Lost Boys. He is now working for Scotland Yard and suspects that the heir to England’s throne, Prince Albert Edward, is under the influence of shadow creatures. These shadow creatures are determined to find a secret cache of starstuff, which fell to London many centuries ago. The starstuff is hidden in an underground vault, which has only one key: the Sword of Mercy, a legendary weapon kept with the crown jewels. Molly is determined to locate and protect, but when she suddenly goes missing, it is up to her eleven-year-old daughter, Wendy, to keep it out of the Others’ clutches. Wendy has heard her mother’s stories of a flying boy named Peter Pan, and he may be her only hope of saving the world from a shadowy doom. . . .

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